Notebook 11 True Life in God 73 May 14, 1987 (Today what joy; in reading the life of St. Teresa of Avila who had visions, I fell upon a vision she describes of hell and I was very pleased to find that her description fitted in my description of hell that God gave me, she explains it this way: "dark and closely confined; the ground seemed to be full of water which looked like filthy, evil-smelling mud" ... etc. yes, the whole thing looked like a grotto, low-ceiling ... my description is on March 7, 1987.) May 15, 1987 come, surrender; I delight to hear you surrendering for in surrendering it rejoices My Heart, little one! ask Me to use you ... Father, if I am of any use to You, use me then! I love you; come, do you wish to write? I will write if it is Your wish. do write then; let it be known that I, Yahweh, willed to enlighten you; your only recourse is Me; My Heart is an abyss of Forgiveness and Mercy; little one, as I have enlightened you, so will I enlighten those who turn to Me; – Vassula come, 1 be closer to Me, Will you receive Me... (Silence from my part.) grieve Me not; (Silence.) be with Me, purify yourself; love Me; (Silence.) 1Jesus was now speaking to me. grieve Me not, beloved... (Silence.) will you receive Me? ... fill Me with joy and be with Me; love Me, I love you; come to Me more often; receive Me more often; I love you; will you pray with Me? 2 wound Me not, (I consented.) Beloved Father, purify me with Your Son’s Blood, Father, purify Me with your Son’s Body, Beloved Father, hold away the evil spirit that now tempts me, amen; (As Jesus was writing it, I was saying it. I suddenly realised, it was like I woke up after Jesus’ prayer. I realised what was happening from the beginning of the message of today. Jesus was calling me to Holy Communion but I was pretending I did not understand. I even felt like answering, no. I was hurting Him and yet I was reluctant to reply, I made Him say it explicitly. Jesus ran to my rescue, I felt I was about to fall. Just after His prayer (He prayed together with me), I realised that I had an evil spirit pulling on me. Strange feeling I had when I felt the evil spirit release his grip on me when the words came “Beloved Father, hold away the evil spirit that now tempts me”. Jesus had put so much force on my hand, my hand felt very heavy, and at the same time I felt His enormous and most powerful strength sustaining me; like a most powerful Giant. After the prayer it was like I woke up.) come nearer to Me; sanctify yourself; I love you and I will sustain your falls; I will not see you lost; a flower needs to be 2Here I felt like saying: “Oh no, not again!”
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