Notebook 11 True Life in God 69 from the body to join Him, and follow Him only. – Suffer; yes, suffering because of not being with Him, of being still material on earth, of having the feeling of being a widow here. – Suffer; to know that I have to follow daily life, material life. It is indeed a burden to be rubbed constantly with a balm of Technology and Science, with disbelievers, with sceptics, with people who think you are losing foot because of age. Suffer; to have to follow their programs. Suffer; to hide one’s feeling when I only feel I want to dissociate from the world and be alone, with God. Just He and me and no one else and nothing else around me to distract me. Even this that I wrote I asked God to help me write down my feelings, since I am unable to express myself, and so He did, whispering the right words in My ear! He wants me to be among mankind; one more cross to carry. My body aches.) Mine too; all you feel I feel; daughter, bless Me, I bless You, my beloved God. (Later, still feeling dissolved in God:) I love you, see? love will suffer, love binds, love offers abundant fidelity, love has no restraint to sacrifice; Vassula, the hours are fleeing, your time is near; offer yourself, grow in humility, eat from My hand; My beloved, I will unbind your chains and your soul will fly to Me very soon; I love you, My God ... May 7, 1987 I love you, it is I, your Spouse, My flower, I will purify you; I will continue saturating you, reviving you with My Light and feeding you with My Strength; Vassula, I will honour you by letting you wear My thorned crown; Jesus, how can You trust me? I love you; by wearing My crown you will understand the mockery I received, for soon you too will be mocked upon; do not forget, I will suffer as much as you will suffer, for I am in you and you in Me; I have united Myself to you, we are one; come now, beloved, we will continue My Works; I will give you enough Strength till the end; (In this message, I understood later on, Jesus prepares me. I will be mocked and laughed upon. At least He is with me, we will share the mockeries together. Once thrust out in the world for my apostolate, the mockery and persecutions will start.) Jesus, do you know I have not even managed to reach a hundred times saying, “I love You”, and You asked me to say it a thousand times! Vassula, ah Vassula, do you not know that every act done with love is telling Me “I love you”; you are showing Me your love in that way too; everything you do in your life you do it to Me; come; embellish! flourish! radiate! fragrance! adorn Me with wreaths of love; let every one of your petals replace a thorn from My thorned crown; the more petals the less thorns piercing Me; I love you; love Me; teach others to love Me; show them My appeal; With Your help I am showing them. I can’t do much. love Me and heal My Wounds; let the tears shed for Me be a soothing balm to My Wounds; Vassula, wreaths are not made only for funerals – they are also
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